Khorne Bikers

Khorne bikers, the Black Widows of 40K. What does this mean you ask? Is this another obscure reference that will possibly come back and mildly relate to 40K? 

Well...Does a white bear shit on ice?

The 1978 classic, Every Which Way but Loose, is worth a lazy afternoon's watch. It features Clint Eastwood during the silver age of his career where he became a huge star after headlining in a number of instant classics such as Dirty Harry ('71), High Plains Drifter ('73), The Outlaw Josie Wales (75' [also directed by Eastwood]), and Escape from Alcatraz ('79).

Every Which Way but Loose is as campy as it gets, perhaps rivaling serious creme de la creme like Point Break and Road House. Eastwood's character, Philo Bedoe, is a rough and tumble good ol' boy who drives a rig for a living and partakes in street brawls for extra pocket money. The comedic relief comes in the form of Bedoe's pet, an orangutan named Clyde.

The basic plot of the movie deals with Bedoe following a pseudo femme fatale, Lynn Halsey Taylor, played by Eastwood's ex-box Sandra Locke. Along the path from Los Angeles to Denver, Bedoe is stalked by the enemies he's made along the way--a couple of bumbling cops he beat the shit out of in a bar brawl and the Black Widows, a biker gang whose bark is worse than their bite. 

Bedoe's first encounter with the Black Widows. 

At first glance, Every Which Way but Loose is just another cheesy yarn about a tough guy who can't lose, but underneath the surface the film's hero is just as soft as all the bad guy's he beats senseless during the course of the movie. Clint's character gets burned by Halsey Taylor. At the end we see what we've suspected all along--that she's been bouncing from guy to guy and Philo was just another notch in her proverbial belt. The invincible Bedoe beats the entire Black Widow gang to a pulp with his own fists but he's just as susceptible to being Shanghaied by his vulnerabilities like any normal schlub. 

At the film's end Bedoe has yet another money making brawl with the legendary but aged Tank Murdock. While he's busy beating the shit out of the over the hill slugger, the crowd quickly turns sour on the old timer. Bedoe witnesses the dark side of seeing our heroes fail and throws the fight in order to preserve the mythology of Murdock. Game over. Bedoe shows his softer, more vulnerable side again. He's human, and therefore beatable, after all.

Lurking out there in the 40K intertubes are many examples of Khorne bikers and all of them represent the fury and power of Khorne's image. The typical biker is decked out with spikes, blood spattered axes and skulls adorning the spikes. Much like the fluff, the bikers of the Blood God, even more so than their brothers, the Berserkers, or their cinematic kin, the Black Widows, own a bark much worse than their bite.

Ma puts a beating on the Black Widows. 

On the battlefield, you've got to be sneaky with these guys lest they'll be dispatched quicker than pink panties past the knees. The positives with Khorne bikers are their mobility and ability to get melta shots into the enemy quickly. I deck mine out with two melta guns and give the sarge some meltabombs. That loadout costs 101 point for three dudes who can move 12 inches and will for the most part be ignored by your opponent because you'll already have a shit ton of scouted flesh hounds coming their way.

On the hobby side...Well, these guys are cool as hell. Let's begin...

The newly boxed chaos bikers is not worth the $40 price tag but you've got to buy it for the bikes themselves which are still pretty cool looking. Inside you'll get no weapon loadouts, however, so you'll have to go to ebay for melta guns. Good job coming out with a fancy new box, but you can't put a silk coat on a pig, GW.

So you'll have to find some better bits to fatten the bikers up a bit. Big deal. That's the fun part of converting is it not? For these guys I went whole hog and picked up the stunning Blood Warriors kit.

A hefty price tag for these suckers at $60 but I figure they'll get some good usage in the future.

Here's the champ/sarge whatever.

I put one of those weird shields on his left arm to count as a lightening claw or powerfist if I have the extra points lying around.

This is why chaos is so damn fun. You can just pile your old bits on.

Here's melta gunner/cannon fodder #1.

Here's #2 all painted up.

Look Ma no hands!

 On to some finished products.

 Pretty happy with how these dudes turned out.

 Especially this fella.

 Here's the gang together.

 And I thought I'd get a shot of them on terrain for shits and grins.

All for now. Until next time. Don't let the sun catch you crying.